The Lady Says: He Say, She Say
Written by The Lady
Ladies, how often, when communicating with a man, do you find yourselves thinking, “I could have sworn he meant, >>>insert your interpretation here<<<” only to find out you were so off base, Ray Charles could have struck you out? Well, I am going to help you decipher this “secret language” to better understand and hopefully, spare you hurt feelings.
Space, the final frontier
HE said: “I just need some space.”
SHE heard: “I’m really stressed about, xyz, and will be okay in a few days.”
HE means: “We’ve been spending too much time together and I want to explore my options, but I don’t want to lose you either.”
The Lady says: The fact of the matter is you now need to accept this for what it is worth and continue to live and enjoy your life. If he wants space, give it to him but make sure you understand what he truly means when making the statement. The downside is he will fall off the face of the earth which means he was not good for you anyway. The upside is he will have a greater appreciation for you and hopefully, your relationship can flourish.
Too busy *side-eye*
HE said: “I have a crazy schedule and no time for a serious relationship.”
SHE heard: “I want to spend time with you but am so busy with work, volunteering, etc.”
HE means: “I’m not really into you and you’re not worth my time BUT I don’t mind a few late night visits.”
The Lady says: You make time for the things we want. PERIOD. Be especially wary of the man who is too busy for you yet has time to hang out with the fellas, plan trips (w/o you) and only calls when he wants “something.”
Just a Friend
HE said: “She’s just an old friend.”
SHE heard: “She’s a girl I used to fool around with.”
HE means: “She’s a girl I used to fool around with.”
The Lady says: If you are in a dating situation and your man has a female “friend” whom you have only heard him speak of, chances are, there was something going on between them in the past (or currently). This is not to suggest, men cannot be platonic friends with women but more often than not, you’ll meet his real female friends. Tread lightly on this issue as you don’t want to appear jealous and psycho.
I’ll call you…
HE said: “I had fun tonight; I’ll give you a call.”
SHE heard: “I can’t wait to see you again.”
HE means: If satisfied with the date, “I am going to call for a second date”; if undecided, “If I don’t have anything else to do, I’ll call.”
The Lady says: Take it for what it is worth. If you had a great time, then say so but do not drive yourself crazy waiting for his call and fantasizing about the next time you will see him. Get a grip. If you really want to talk to him but he has not called, then you call him. At least you will not have to wonder if he is interested and you can stop worrying.
It’s complicated
HE said: “I don’t have a girlfriend but I am seeing someone *sigh* it’s complicated.”
SHE heard: “I don’t have a girlfriend and am about to break it off with the one I’m seeing for you.”
HE means: “I have a girlfriend but am hoping you don’t care and let me have my cake and eat it too.
The Lady says: RUN! Run, far and fast! There is no mistaking; he is looking for some extra-credit. If he was in such a complicated situation, why stay? Ask yourself, do you really want to be bothered with a man who is indecisive and plays games? Hmph, there you have it.
Please understand, in each situation, there is always room for interpretation. However, you must learn to become effective communicators. If you are unsure, just ask instead of over-thinking the situation. It really is that simple.
Peace,
The Lady
three words: I love it
ReplyDeleteenough said!